So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
