ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
