She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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