arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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