The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
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