Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize
