they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
