Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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