dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize