So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
