Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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