I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
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