Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
