it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
