Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
