Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
