I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Are my feet made of real feet?
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Sorry my hands just texted you
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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