eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
