yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
of course. lets lasso hookers.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize