sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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