Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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