the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
