Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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