my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
