and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
