I hate all girls vehemently.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
