That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
wat bout pragnant strippers??
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
