Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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