Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
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