dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
