they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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