My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
