He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Randomize
