I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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