Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
This is my gift to your gina
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
