Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just googled if crying burns calories
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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