So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
