what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
