Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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