Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
