I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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