dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
