U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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