I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
