I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
