Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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