Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
