I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
