Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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