oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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